Land of Hopeless Wishes

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Posts : 78
Join date : 2007-09-26
Age : 29
Location : California

PostSubject: ABORTION::   ABORTION:: Icon_minitimeSat Sep 27, 2008 12:50 am

i was pregnant like two months ago with boy that was only 17 and im only 18..
well when i found out i was pregnant i told the dad and he FLIPPED out on me.
he told me F--- YOU KILL IT KILL IT F--- YOU!
and im like OMGGGG!!!!!!!!!! im PREGNANT with your KID!!!
but i told him i was KEEPING the baby and he got POd said he was gonna POISON Me so it would POISON THE BABY AND KILL IT BUT NOT ME CUZ HE LOVED ME
and sooo i flipped said i would take care of it by myself and that i didn't need his sorry jobless behind...
he got all POd AGAIN wanted to get crazy with me and i was just like f--- you im not your girlfriend anymore you got a new dumb girl anywayss.
and he was like well NO i love YOU keep the baby..
so i said alright but i dont want you anymore cuz of that girl..
so then he said AGAIN that i should kill it...
i was SO sure i was gonna keep it...i mean...i already loved it..but then...
omg day i got teased soo bad about what kind of mom i was gonna be what kind of kid i would have because of how bad a mom i was gonna be...
i KNEW i would need welfare and take care of it REALLY poor...
i kept fighting with my boyfriend all the time and i was like in love with another guy the whole time that lived in IDaho that i was dating and HE played me TOO....
but i killed my baby..
i went down and had my aboriton 4 days shy of being 3 months pregnant...i took all the right pills and it came out like the WORST PAINFUL period i have ever known...
i was having contractions and i COULD NOT lay still or move too much i was in SOOOOO much pain.....
ohh i wanted to die...
i realized i murdered my own unborn baby and i was gonna have to live with that FOREVER....
im STILL heartbroken..
im freaking out...
it was supposed to be born March 19 2009
oh my god i cant talk to anyone about this...
one of my best friends has a kid and she is like YOU SHOULD HAVE KEPT IT AND BEEN POOR
but she has her mom to help her i have NOONE.
cant stop crying over it my heart is broken...
its hard to live like this everyday..
Crying or Very sad
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